10 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (remember that email from last week?).

9 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (there’s also an announcement on the bulletin board…).

8 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (…and the department website).

7 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (it should be a good one, speaker is a good guy).

6 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (and it will take place at the usual room, in case someone is wondering).

5 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (afterwards we’ll go for lunch, would anyone like to join?).

4 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (too bad, but would you like to meet the speaker?).

3 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (he’s a really good guy. Really.).

2 minutes to the condensed matter seminar! (we’ll take him out for dinner).

1 minute to the condensed matter seminar! (would you like to join?)

Condensed matter seminar! (next week we’ll have a really good one, in the usual place and time, we’ll email you the details).

(with apologies to the delightful original).